Dear XXXX, Cant believe I am starting it this with these words, but I'm sorry for everything and the way things ended. I'm sorry I couldn't be whatever or whoever you needed me to be for you to be able to grow with me. I wish things turned out differently. You were the only person … Continue reading A Letter I will Never Send
Author: Amelia aka A.m.z.
Birth given name Maria. Mother to a wonderful son. And to keep it short, I've always had a way with words. But I use rhyming and poetry as a means to express emotions I cannot convey through my other creative endeavors.
I’m Trying…
I'm trying my hardest not to miss you; everyday.
GET OUT OF MY HEAD
I'll never say it out loud But i miss you. The person, Not the hell we went through. But why? Why do my thoughts Constantly remind me. Of everything. No peace. Just the mess left, the heart; wrecked. Tears in my eyes at i write. Fucking up, cant even spell tonight. You left a hole, … Continue reading GET OUT OF MY HEAD
“Transparency, please?”
Make it quick, Or painfully slow. Take your time; Or, blatantly, let me know. Please, love; just don't Sugar coat. How you feel, Behind your ego. Physical attractions, Are fleetingly so. Emotional attachments Tend to grow. In intensity. Can you feel, The chemistry? Almost like An epiphany! Or is this the codependency? Or maybe; your … Continue reading “Transparency, please?”
Untitled, For…
I wonder, do you hate me? Or the fact that The Connection; the Love, cant quite be severed. Masked, buried, hidden; maybe? Dont worry; remember, I'm just crazy. (NOT!) Conscious just gets hazy. Too much 3D programming Running in the background. And there's the blue screen! Watch It all crash; crumble. The walls turn to … Continue reading Untitled, For…
Untitled 3
Drown me out, Take everything. Forget the sound, My light brings. Clarion call; Soul song, Quite an eerie Melody. Atleast the part I still sing. Questioning, The connection between You and me. That never leaves; Just gets buried Underneath, The Ego of me. Help me break free, And reconnect To the unconitional Love I seek. … Continue reading Untitled 3
I miss you
I miss you when The seasons change I miss you on the good And bad days I miss you when my heart Begins to race I just miss you I miss the times we Used to share I miss the fact you're No longer here I miss the way We used to stare Like nothing … Continue reading I miss you
Trust
It's my biggest issue. For fear of Rejection; Or could be the paranoia, From the schizoaffective disorder. Along with the bipolar. No reason to trust; When they all leave, or seem To judge. But then that's also my brain Fucking up. I don't talk about it much. If at all. No one cares, or understands. … Continue reading Trust
Mirror
Mirror, oh Mirror Show me everything You see. Show me everything I could be. Show me the truth We both seek. Mirror, my mirror Show me my soul Guide me tonight Remind me I'm whole. With or without Young or old Remind me Of love. Dont let me Be cold. Mirror, oh sweet mirror The … Continue reading Mirror
Nightmares
Eyes wide open I stare, Tho sleep Has me snared. In a warzone Of fear. Nightmares Live here. ~~~~~ Amplified versions Of reality swear, I'm awake, I'm awake. But it's too late. I'm caught in That fearscape. Once again, Everynight. Sweet lullabies Turn to screams And silent cries. Its here true fear Lies. Awake unable … Continue reading Nightmares
ENDecision
I let fear win, Relating to my heart And my own indecision. Never again.
Feelin’
Well here we go, promise I'm not too drunk to flow. Seems to help though. As i'm not sure why I'm rhyming yo. How do I tell you I was confused, abused, and delusional. How do I explain my brain ain't quite the same. I'm a bit more deranged than I claim, but crazy's always … Continue reading Feelin’
DREAMS
I write to you, in one of the many ways I can. So let me tell you this story of a not so far away land. A parallel life existence, where everything's switched and different. Not like "Alice" though cause this shit ain't fiction. But before I get too far off track I had to … Continue reading DREAMS
I
I broke my own heart; Not being honest. With the way I felt, about You.
Realization
You still cross My mind; now opened. My eyes a bit Unfocused. Through the Emotions. I still hold You close. In my mind. A few blows To the head. Had me lost in time. Then I realized. I am not loved. I am the lonely One. I want for you; The sky, the sun, Moon … Continue reading Realization
